GRAYHAVEN COMICS APPRENTICE- 1st Challenge- The Judge’s Feedback

RAY– First up, I’d like to congratulate everyone who turned in a pitch this week. We lost four contestants before the challenge was even over, so all of you should be very proud of the work you put in. There were a lot of creative pitches, some that were pretty much note-perfect, and some that didn’t quite hit the mark for us. The judges all read them and gave our thoughts, as well as ranking them from 1-14. We’re going to reveal our bottom three, as well as this challenge’s overall winner. From there, we’ll have questions for the bottom three, and there could be more contestants leaving the game. After that, we’ll put you into teams, and that phase of the game will begin. Best of luck, and I’ll post the judges’ thoughts. 

ANDREW- I know you’ve all had a busy week and have been stressing the last 24 hours so sorry for the delay. All the judges have tried to give you each feedback on your creative teams, the books and overall rank. At the end we will reveal the bottom 3. Those three contestants will have to ‘enter the boardroom’ and face questions from the four judges. Then we will reveal who is fired and who goes back into the game for week two.

 MARC- Let me lead off by saying that I’m treating this All-Star/Ultimatization as a true reboot and letting the pitches do whatever they want. I’m not looking for something in the vein of what Ultimate blah-blah-blah was. I want to see characters that are changed. I don’t want to see just an updated origin for Superman incorporating iPhones. That’s boring, so I say to the contestants – have at it!

SHANE-

Andrew: Creators– I can see David Simon and even George RR Martin wanting to dabble in comics, especially if it’d be a high profile new universe type thing in a limited capacity but I really don’t buy the James Cameron choice.  Still the Simon and Martin choices are pretty big stretches in general and while I like the artistic choices I think you came up a bit short (if not unrealistic) in this part of the challenge.  3/10

Andrew: Books– On their own I like most of these. I think Twilight has a lot of promise but was disappointed we didn’t get more into the story itself and how it would develop. I also don’t know why the choice was made to make it not connected to the other books. As this would be a new universe of the existing DCU then we’re spinning it off into a 3rd (4th if you count the 52 Earth 2 book). I like where you went with Wonder Woman, changing up her origin but keeping the spirit of her character. 5/10

Andrew: Total- 4/10

Glenn:The Good

Good interesting layout to your pitch.  Makes it stand out a little.

Using the Man Of Steel title for your Superman book is what DC should have done with Unchained.  You’re tapping into the audience that are going to see the film (this could also count against you but eh).

I like your Wonder Woman pitch a lot.  There are a lot of eyebrow raisers yes but it sounds like a solid do-over rather than a radical departure.  Not crazed on the name of Diana’s company but it’s a minor quibble.  Also the most solid creative team we’ve seen so far.

The Iffy

I like elements of your Batman pitch.  Using elements from DKR and Batman Begins is a smart move but starting from scratch for a new audience it seems like some odd choices.  You want to draft in a new audience and it seems that a lot of prior knowledge is required for this book and you’re not really getting ‘Batman’ but instead getting ‘Batmen’.  It reads as a very good elseworld pitch but not so much an Ultimate do over.

Again your Superman pitch falls into the same pitfall.  A decent idea but just a solid what if, not a foundation for a new generation of fans.

Some of your creators are a stretch and downright poor (see also: The Bad).  I can almost see Martin and Simon at a stretch and they certainly make sense in relation to the pitches you presented but this wasn’t about grabbing big names for these books.  Part of this challenge was about elevating promising independent talent and you’ve gone for Hollywood power houses.  Again I can see these two at a stretch but then we get to James Cameron.

The Bad

I appreciate your eagerness but plugging your Kickstart in the pitch comes across as desperate and unprofessional.  You’re here to sell yourself to us, not your product to everyone.  I remember in the UK version someone tried to plug their business on the show and got fired on the spot.  It’s not necessary.

Twilight Saga is a great example of thinking outside the box that misses the mark.  This again sounds like an else world title but a very, very bad one.  I know what you’re going for but I just don’t see anyone interested in this book at all.  I don’t want to use the word terrible but it is, it’s really terrible.

James Cameron writing a comic isn’t going to happen.  I think fans would hate it, he would hate it and if he did the book would never come out.  Instead of taking a promising independent writer you take a man who has more money than he knows what to do with.  You’re thinking what would sell rather than what makes logical sense.

Overall

Some flashes of promise but overall not really what we asked for.  If this where an else world challenge you’d be doing quite well despite your puzzling creative decisions.  This is a new launch for new fans though and you just the mark in that regard entirely.

Also please stop with the shameless self promotion.

Ray- For me, this is basically how NOT to do an Ultimate revamp. These aren’t so much modern but iconic revamps but complete reinventions that go against the very core of the characters in some cases. Batman as a police network is an interesting twist, but Bruce already being retired and more of the Oracle makes this more of a Batman Beyond story. Wonder Woman is full of so many strange, unnecessary changes that it feels like she’s not really her own character anymore. I hate that her origin is now rooted in Superman’s. Speaking of Superman, I like the more sci-fi oriented take on the character, but making him a mass murderer who didn’t grow up on Earth is, frankly, unforgivable. This isn’t Superman, it’s General Zod in a Superman costume. And then we have Twilight Earth, an alternate universe within an alternate universe that sticks out like a sore thumb. I like the story here the best of all of these, but the idea of Moore allowing his concepts to be used by someone else is crazy. The creative teams here are not what I wanted to see. While the artists are good, the writers are so insanely unrealistic. Martin and Cameron are notoriously slow workers, often taking the better part of a decade to get a new story out. You can’t have them on a monthly title. Rothfus and Simon, while not quite as unrealistic, are still long shots. I wish he had gone the direction of the Ultimate U and promoted talented indie comic creators. And this is a minor quibble, but Dick Grayson is one of the only Roma heroes in the DCU, and as such isn’t a character that needs to be racebent.


MarcPutting a self-promoting link in the first few paragraphs of your initial pitch lacks tact. It’s a nice way of instantly taking me out of reading the pitch, so I would do my best to avoid that sort of thing moving forward unless the task calls for it. It shows me you have initiative, but it’s the wrong place and wrong time. I’m also not a fan of the email format of the pitch, but it certainly shows creativity. The choices for creative teams were TOO far outside of the box on this one. Rothfuss? Martin? David Simon? JAMES CAMERON? With so many talented writers already in comics who would have qualified as choices, you went completely outside the realm of feasibility. I thought the Superman concept was unreadable and fans wouldn’t like what they got by the third issue. I actually liked seeing Wonder Woman’s origins harken back to her actual Greek/Mediterranean heritage and though the tie-in to Superman’s mythos was the best thing about this pitch (especially Zod as Ares). The Twilight Earth concept of Alan Moore’s story and borrowing heavily from Song of Fire & Ice with Martin writing it was very uninspiring. It was taking an elevator pitch to the extreme. Not one of my favorite pitches.

RYAN

Andrew Creators– Generally I like the creative teams. The biggest issue I have is putting Gail Simone on one of the books. Now technically she is on Batgirl right now, not the ‘franchise’ title as stated in the rules but she is very familiar with the DCU having written both Action Comics and Wonder Woman. 4/10

Andrew Books– Story-wise I thought the books were sound. SAVAGE is a risky choice in terms of being a marquee title to launch a universe with but I really liked the concept. I don’t really like the idea of older versions of the characters in the other books. It seems more like something that long term readers would like as an alt world story than as a fresh take for new readers like the Ultimate. 6/10

Andrew: Total- 5/10

Glenn: The Good

I like that you’ve given your ‘Ultimate’ imprint its own distinctive name.  It ties them all together and conveys a clear message to readers that says ‘We’re separate than all those other guys’ it’s smart thinking.

Your creative teams for Superman and Savage sound solid enough.

The Iffy

Superman again sounds like a solid else world and sounds like a great equivalent to Dark Knight Returns but isn’t suitable for a do-over or new fans.

Batman reads a new storyline in the existing universe and not a new jumping on point for readers.  I feel like I’m jumping into the middle which is not a good feeling when you’ve stepped into a reboot to bring in new fans to the franchise.

Justice League sounds like the same as your Superman pitch.  It’s Justice League done DKR style but it’s not a reboot.

The Bad

Giving a villain his own title is always a risk and especially when you’re launching a whole new universe.  Instead of giving a book to Wonder Woman, Flash, Aquaman or Green Lantern you give a title to…Vandal Savage.  Really puzzling decision and I think you were trying to go outside the box which is commendable but when you can’t even see the box you’re so far outside it then you’re in trouble.

Putting Spencer and Simon on books implies you didn’t read the pitch specifications very well.  Both have worked with DC before (Gail has for years on countless prominent books) just shows that you either ignored us/got sloppy.  Neither of these really says to me you’re going to last long.

Overall

Some solid else world stuff but again not a suitable relaunch.  Some puzzling decisions and some blatant disregard for the pitch directions doesn’t inspire much confidence.

Ray-I’m really confused by the decision to start the Ultimate Universe with the characters older and embittered already, which is the exact opposite of what Marvel did. There’s a cynicism to this Superman pitch that I really dislike, with an old, lonely Clark Kent. The creative team is solid, but this isn’t a Superman book I’d want to read. I’m just really confused by the choice of Savage as one of the four titles. It could have potential as a globe-trotting horror book, especially with this writer, but with so many great properties missing in action, it isn’t compelling enough to make me want to see it as one of the entry points for a new universe. Batman suffers from a lot of the same problems as Superman, being a late in the game, cynical universe as opposed to an entry point. The decision to kill off Bruce before we ever meet him is a puzzle to me. In addition, Nick Spencer is currently co-writing Avengers, so he wouldn’t be eligible for this challenge. I actually quite like the pitch for the Justice League title, which has a good mix of characters and a decent hook, but Gail Simone has written countless flagship books like Action Comics, Wonder Woman, and Batgirl. Lot of problems with this pitch, in both creative teams and direction.

Marc– I like half of the creative teams, but Gail Simone having written Wonder Woman essentially disqualifies her from consideration and putting the Bedlam creative team on a book like Gotham is more uninspired than inspired. I fear that Gotham would have too much of a been there, done that feel. I also do not like the overall ambivalence of the universe. Everything seems so depressing and bleak that I think readership would be hard to come by. I also think that having Bruce Wayne dead from the beginning is a big mistake, much more so than the chance Bendis took when he put Miles Morales in the Spider-Man costume. Savage was a daring choice. Not one of the best overall pitches but not the worst

STEVE

Andrew: Creators– I think you nailed it on creative teams. John Jackson Miller on Green Lantern in particular seems like it would be great. 10/10

Andrew: Books– I think you chose a strong line up for books covering the biggest franchises of the DCU as well as a cult hit book with Magic.  I also like how you planned for the eventual JLA launch by tying the franchises together. 8/10

Andrew: Total- 9/10

Glenn: Again good move to brand your books as unified but separate than everything else.  Although you’ve stolen Marvel’s name but hey it was in the challenge name so I won’t hold it against you.

Love the sound of your Superman book.  It takes chances but still is a solid lead in for new readers and has some great opportunities for new stories and new situations which aren’t possible in the exiting titles.

Same for your Green Lantern book, it’s different but familiar.  This is one of the hardest books to pull off since Johns rebuilt the franchise up from scratch relatively recently but I think you manage to do a solid job.

Your creative teams are amazing.  This is exactly what we wanted, new faces to the big two who could deliver the work.  The only error you made was on Green Lantern but the artist choice is amazing.

The Iffy- Personal preference but in an Ultimate reboot I’d rather see Batman fight his foes and not the legion of Darkseid’s hordes.  I get you’re trying to tie everything into Justice League but it makes Batman not feel like Batman.  There are some solid ideas in the pitch though but the latter end takes me out of it.

I like your Ultimate Magic book A LOT.  It sounds like an amazing book but I’m not sure if it should be here over Wonder Woman or Flash.  I’m conflicted on this one though,

A lot of your books are gearing towards Justice League 1.  I think you’d have been better let them breathe on their own for a while first.  It sounds like you’re building towards your first event right off the bat which may turn off any potential new readers who want to ‘cherry pick’ Ultimate books that interest them rather than feel forced to read the whole line.

The Bad

John Jackson Miller has a brief run on Iron Man previously.  Easy to miss I think but I still have to take it into consideration.

Overall

Some minor stumbling points but overall really, really good.  This is exactly what I wanted to see.  The John Jackson Miller error and your iffy (to me) Batman book may cost you the top spot but this pitch is pretty damn good overall

Ray– This is more like it. I feel like Steve grasped the core of this challenge and gave us a group of very solid, promising titles. I like that he tries to tie the universe together from the start, although the very cosmic nature of the threat stands the danger of turning off casual fans. His Superman title is a very radical revamp and feels more like a What If than an Ultimate take, but it does keep the core of Superman intact and the creative team is excellent. I could see Smith writing a great Superman. Batman is the title that I feel suffers the most from being tied in with the cosmic universe. While the creative team is strong, I feel like having Apokaliptan villains in the title from the start makes it hard to connect with Batman’s inherent nature. Didn’t like the reference to Batman killing a villain, and this doesn’t really feel like a Bat-book. Fortunately, he bounces back with Green Lantern, picking a great writer in John Jackson Miller. While I have issues with the decision to kill Hal off quickly – if I was going for an “iconic” Green Lantern, Kyle would be the last name on my list – it’s a strong read. Ultimate Magic is a risk, being an unconventional title, but it’s actually my favorite of the four titles. I think the magic side of the DCU is ripe for a big push, and this is a strong pitch with some really promising characters. Overall, this is a far from perfect, but it’s a credible pitch for a realistic Ultimate DCU.

Marc  I really like the overall plan for the books and while I usually detest universe-wide crossover events, the 11th & 12th issue tie-in event that builds to a Justice League title is a really good idea that I think will work well. Having the Ultimate Detective book start off by taking on Darkseid & the Parademons gives the sense that the character would be well overmatched. Having Batman kill Godfrey seems severe. Some of the pitches were sloppily written: the Superman pitch is far too involved in describing two small scenes while the GL pitch has the following sentence: “Obsessed with new universes and worlds, Krona has become obsessed with knowledge of new worlds…” Also, does Hal Jordan die in the first issue? The pitch is not clear on this. Ultimate Magic is a nice idea but lacks the star power for a successful run.

 

COURTLAND

Andrew: Creators– I really liked the choices for X-Men and eX-Men and while I do enjoy Sakai and Smith I’m not sure the former would take the gig and not really liking the latter on the art chores though as a writer, yes. 6/10

Andrew: Books– With the exception of Captain America it seems very X-based line which is certainly popular but was surprised by the lack of Avengers/Spider-Man. That said I do think the Daredevil/Wolverine team up in The Hand would be pretty intriguing and is one of my favorite ideas of the contest. 7/10

Andrew: Total- 6.5/10

Glenn: The Good– I like the sound of your X-Force and eX-Men books.  Some interesting choices made and although you do rely on the potentially heavy status quo (see: the iffy) it sounds like a solid book with a good cast.  Kudos for having Human Torch/Peter Parker on the teams as well, this is thinking outside the box stuff that works.

Your Cap book sounds brilliant.  Doing new concepts with the character that have never been done before but keeping many familiar elements.  I don’t feel it feels as bogged down with your back story as the other books either.

Your creative teams sound very solid.  You do pick from outside comics but only in one instance and I see your logic behind it.  There’s one exception though but I think it’s something we’d all want to see (see: The Iffy)

The Iffy

Sounds like a lot of set up for your universe.  I assume you’ll be explaining most of the back story in the books but it sounds like a lot up front.  I feel that with a relaunched Universe like this you want to come in as clean as possible and not overload the reader with info and feel like they’ve walked into the start of a movie.

The Hand sounds like a solid book but doesn’t feel right for a relaunch.  Again it falls into the category of really, really good what if but is an odd book to launch your new line with.  I think new readers would feel a little lost with this one.

Not sure about Mike Zeck on a book.  I’d love to see him back in comics but he doesn’t done anything in years.  This is like bringing Steve Ditko back almost.

The Bad

No Spider-Man book?  I know he’s there but not giving him his own book seems like a glaring error.  Especially when you have 2 X-Men books right off the bat.  I know the X-Men are popular but when you’re relaunching you want to make sure your not going to the same well too early.  There were several books that should have taken the spot of your X-Men titles, Spider-Man being the most obvious.

Overall

Some flashes of brilliance but it’s like going to see a really good movie and having a guy stand outside the screen and having to give you a big intro before you go in.  Things like that can work but when your relaunching I don’t think so.  A mixed bad I think.

Ray– Our first Marvel pitch! While I generally dislike the overtly fascist, bigoted vibe of the Marvel Universe, I feel like Courtland has given us a more realistic take on it than the previous Ultimate Universe (which had Mutants being murdered in the streets). My big problem is that this is essentially an X-men universe, everyone else is just living in it. Three of the four titles have clear X-men ties, but both X-Force and Ex-Men have very strong concepts and an interesting mix of characters. The Hand as a title is just completely insane – Wolverine and Daredevil take control of the Hand – but somehow, it works as this gritty, violent grindhouse title written by a master of the genre. It’s the Captain America pitch, though, that really makes this pitch shine. The idea of Cap as the first American mutant is kind of brilliant, and I love the way his origin was sort of fused with Winter Soldier’s. I would have liked to see better use of all that the Marvel Universe has to offer, but as an X-men centric universe, this is a very solid pitch with some great, out of the box creative teams

Marc I really like the EiCA idea, but to expect that superpowers would be banned from warfare (and that any country would accept this) is a terrible idea. Halfway into the X-Force pitch the main characters are ignored for good and it becomes a Captain America pitch. The Hand is a neat idea, but why change Matt Murdock’s name? I love the story and it’s something I would read. The pacing on the Cap pitch is way off. Lack of consistency throughout the pitch: eX-men and Ex-men. eX-force and X-force. These are simple mistakes but show some sloppiness.

FORREST

Andrew: Creators– I do like the creative teams a lot. I just don’t know if someone like Berger would settle for something work for hire. I like it. I just don’t know how feasible it is, which is the same misgivings I have about Chabon on two books. Love the artists. 6/10

Andrew: Books– This one seems much more like an Elseworlds book than an Ultimiization. Again the risk there being that a concept like this would be favored more by existing readers than a great jumping on point for new readers. I think all four of the books are sound and I really like the world that was created here. I just don’t know if it fit the concept completely. 6/10

Andrew: Total- 6/10

Glenn: The Good– I like your pitch layout, very professional.

Good creative teams except for the Detective Writer.

The Iffy

Another huge elseworld pitch rather than a suitable relaunch.  All the books sound great but again I think you’ve missed the point of the challenge.  This reads more like DC doing their own version of 1602 rather than a fresh starting point.  I said it before, if this was an elseworld challenge you’d be front of the pack but it’s not.

Although she technically never wrote anything for DC I think there are a lot of up and coming creators that deserves a push on a book over Karen Berger who has already made her name in comics.

You have 2 similar books here.  Like I said in a prior pitch there’s lots of rooms for creativity and diversification here.  Don’t waste it by giving us 2 books of a similar tone right off the bat.  I think the time period you selected did limit your choices though but if you can stretch Cyborg to work surely you could have found a way for another DC hero to fit in too?

The Bad

Nothing terrible this time but kind of missed the mark

Overall: Elseworld?  Yes.  Ultimate?  No

Ray- There’s a big difference between a good pitch and a good pitch that fits the challenge. This…is a good pitch. First, I want to say that this is really creative and clever. The obvious inspiration is the brilliant “The Golden Age” by James Robinson. One of my favorite stories. But the core of the Ultimate line is “Modernized but iconic”. This is really neither. It’s an Elseworlds, a tribute to a bygone era of comics. The creative teams are very solid, although the very busy Michael Chabon writing not one but two titles is a big stretch. Karen Berger’s Batman is a strong take on what a WW2 Batman would be like. Chabon’s main WW2 book has a lot of promise, and The Times seems like it could be a very unconventional title – sort of a Gotham Central for the world of Journalism. Cyborg is the oddest pick here, a character who doesn’t really seem like he’d fit in the WW2 era. The execution is fairly strong, though. In the end, I feel like this is a series I’d like to see. I could see DC putting it out as a prestige Before Watchmen-like product. But it’s not Ultimate DC.

Marc– You also had the great idea of using the last two issues from the first year of each series to tie the books together – UNTIL you made Cyborg a title focused on younger readers. That immediately makes those readers have to read something that may not be at their level. I love the New Frontier feel of this and think it’s a fun idea. I also like using the same arc breakdown for each title as that’s very new reader friendly. Words and commas are your friends but only if you use them correctly. Avoid sentences like this: “A Robin would be present; however, it would be a female Robin, much like Frank Miller’s DKR; however, her role would not be as a field agent, but instead , more along the lines of a support role along the lines of Oracle. “ Putting Chabon on two books is a stretch, as I would like to have seen four different writers utilized.

NATHAN

Andrew: Creators– I really, really like the creative teams here. I think they’re solid all around. 9/10

Andrew: Books– I think your Shield and X books are very very well done and sort of embody the world building new start that an Ultimitization would require. Surprised at the lack of an Avengers presence and Cloak & Dagger and Black Cat are interesting choices. I’m a fan of Black Cat and the way you set up the book and the C&D overview seems strong but I’m not sure how those two books would capture readers outside the gate. 7/10

Andrew Total- 8/10

Glenn: The Good

Another great pitch layout, it’s a dream to read something broken down so well with having to read through so many pitches J

Your Nick Fury and X books both sound amazing.  Both sound like compelling and interesting books that again take familiar elements and do something completely new.  In recent years books like Secret Warriors shows there is a market for a Nick Fury book and it could bring in some casual movie fans.  You also have some good set ups for spin off books if your line is successful.

Apart from X your creative teams are solid and the type of creators I expected to see picked.

The Iffy

Your other 2 books while very good are a little more inclined to be head scratchers.  Cloak and Dagger us a property that always struggled to find its footing.  I don’t think it’s the right choice for a relaunch of a new line but the book itself does sound very good.

I think you’re having Black Cat in place of a Spider-man book.  It’s a risky move that could really work (with that creative team it probably would) or could fall flat on its face.  I’m not sure if it’s genius or insanity to be honest

The Bad

Bunn has worked with DC before and is getting a big push from both companies at the moment.  He probably is who Marvel would logically pick for a relaunch but not what the challenge asked for.

Overall

Great pitch overall with a few stumbles and questions mark.  Picking Bunn may keep you from a top spot but there was some brilliant ideas here and is the best layout to a pitch so far I think.

Ray- Another Marvel pitch, a rare thing this challenge. I think Nathan has a good balance of titles all around. I like the idea of a superhuman arms race and the prominence of SWORD and SHIELD in the world. Starting with the books, Nick Fury is obviously a character who’s had a massive resurgence thanks to the movie, so I think this is a really strong pick. The title reads like a compelling spy thriller, and it serves as an interesting backbone to the universe. It’s a very bold move to set this several years before most of the heroes have even appeared on the scene. I also really like Nathan’s take on the X-men. He does a good job with the dichotomy between Xavier and Magneto without full-on villainizing Magneto. Again, I think this is actually superior to the original Ultimate X-men. I do, however, think he made a big mistake by killing Magneto at the end of the first year. I’m not as big a fan of the back half of Nathan’s titles. Black Cat by Joe Hill and Fiona Staples would undoubtedly be a great book, but it still feels like an odd choice with such limited spots. Same goes for Cloak and Dagger. I like the idea of a magic-based book, but the pitch is a bit thin compared to the others. Also, with Eric Powell being so anti-corporate comics, I doubt he’d write it. Overall, though, there are some missteps, but his first two books are so strong that it makes up for them. Well done

Marc- Not really wowed by the creative teams; Joe Hill on Black Cat especially as that is the weakest of your pitches and doesn’t even really describe more than one issue’s worth of storyline. The Fury pitch has so much potential but spent so much time on the first issue that it rushed through the rest. I don’t like the idea of X being used essentially as origin story one-shots that end up getting canceled and relaunched, at all. Bobby Drake isn’t mentioned as a character but his fire abilities (??) are listed as one of the issue breakdowns. Some loose writing throughout the pitch shows this may have been a little rushed and could have used another once-over. The Cloak & Dagger pitch has as much potential as Fury but is too lean. The titles were way too much of a reach leaving out the Hulk, Cap, Iron Man, Thor and most of Marvel’s biggest characters. Learning to summarize storylines (whether it’s one issue or 12 issues) is what you need to work on the most.

WILLIAM

Andrew: Creators Very impressed with the creative teams across the board. I think they’re all very good creators who could probably pretty seamlessly step into books like these. 9/10

Andrew: Books– You certainly did go big and detailed. It was a very well done and thought out pitch. Yes a line of four team up books seems like an outside the box choice but you did go with some strong choices: an Avengers, a Spider-Man and an X-Men. Midnight Sons is an outside the box choice but I like what you did with it. Also I thought the idea of a Spider-Man team utilizing all the different characters was very interesting. I also like how you connected these stories into a bigger arc/crossover in the next ‘year’. 9/10

Andrew Total- 9/10

Glenn: The Good

Apart from a lengthy into (see: the iffy) I think 3 of your books sound brilliant.  I noticed the majority of the contestants chose the DC universe.  Likely because the initial Ultimate Universe raised the bar for what quality comics could be.  Following in those foot steps is a daunting task but I think you managed it.

Switching people to different teams, gender swapping that makes sense, giving people new and interesting roles that we could never see in the main line.  This is all stuff I wanted from this challenge and more.  Your pitch is incredibly detailed and answers any possible questions I could have.  I could do a blow by blow account of what I liked but I just found the pitch incredibly solid throughout.

Great creative teams too (you nearly really confused me with Mark Miller lol) except for Mr. Ross

The Iffy

A lot of set up for your new world.  Again I think it’s information overload for a new universe.

I feel using the Game Of Thrones title is pandering a little but it’s a minor quibble.

I don’t think Jonathon Ross would be able to commit to an ongoing in this type of universe.  A decent choice but I feel I would lead to very few issues coming out which isn’t what you want with a relaunch.

Not really sold on your Midnights sons books.  It’s not terrible but I just think with the high quality of your other books you could have done ‘more’.

The Bad

Nothing horrific I can see.

Overall

Why can’t every pitch be like this?

Ray- And the third of our Marvel pitches this week. I really like the core concept of the Earth becoming a galactic melting pot, with the strange and extraordinary becoming commonplace. I think he has some of the strongest creative teams, starting with Jonathan Ross on Avengers. Thor is not the first character that comes to mind for a gender-flip, but the roster here is unique and well-thought out. The cosmic vibe of the team works very well. I’m a bit torn on his Spider-men pitch. While Jimmie Robinson is a perfect choice for this title, it does feel a bit fanservice-y to work in four Spider-kids right off the bat. As a fan, I like it, but as an editor…maybe dump Arana? She never caught on like Peter, Jess, and Miles. Norma Osborn is another odd gender-bend, and one that I don’t see going over well – is it really progress if a violent male psychopath becomes a violent female one? But the title seems like a ton of fun, and I want to read it. Midnight Sons is a longer shot for a hit, as Marvel’s dark magic heroes haven’t caught on to the same degree. But the pitch and team are strong and the arcs have a lot of promise. The X-men book is really well-executed, keeping the familiar conflicts intact while adding some really interesting new wrinkles based on the alien presence on Earth. Love the choice of Dysart as well. Overall, this was easily my favorite of the four Marvel pitches.

Marc– THIS is how you craft a new universe using familiar faces. I love that Reed is President and seeing the make-up of the Avengers team is great. Gender-swapping BOTH Victor(ia) Von Doom and Norma(n) Osborne is a flub. A few spelling issues (“plain crash”) but overall a really fun pitch for a very readable universe. I don’t mind that they’re all team books as they all allow for a sprawling universe that can spin off multiple titles with ease. The creative teams all worked really well, too.

RONALD

Andrew: Creators I really like what you did with the creative teams. Palahniuk is one of those choices that I don’t fully buy him doing a Batman title like this but boy oh boy do I like how you presented it. And Marjorie Liu would be great playing in the DCU. I like how you put Jim Lee, a powerhouse artist, on a title like Lois Lane which might not be as popular sales wise.  8/10

Andrew Books I think you went with 3 obvious choices to anchor a new universe and one outside the box choice that has an A+ artist attached to help it in the market. I think you did a very good job of modernizing these characters and giving them a proper tune up without drastically altering anything that would make them unrecognizable to readers new or old. I would read each and every one of these. 10/10

Andrew Total- 9/10

Glenn- The Good

3 of your books sound great with Superman, Lois Lane (See: Iffy though for the now familiar 2 books in the same line mistake) and Wonder Woman all sounding great.   You have a good mixture of the familiar and the new to make these books stand out and give new readers interesting new status quo’s to explore in each book.

The Iffy

Although I know you intend your Lois book to go beyond Superman it still on the surface reads as having 2 books in the same line.  It sounds like in some ways the same book split across 2 titles which is something to avoid in a relaunch.

The Bad

Overall it reads a little rushed.  You get away with it the majority of the time but the most glaring victim is your Batman pitch.  I don’t get the intro to it, why is Clayface disguising himself as Bruce Wayne and why isn’t Batman doing something about it?  Very confused on this one.

Also Marjorie Lui has worked with Marvel for years on several major properties.  Another victim of not following the guidelines.

Overall

The bare bones of something great but I feel there was some points missed.  The Batman pitch is just confusing to me.

Ray-  He’s got a really good hook, giving us the chance to watch the Trinity become heroes rather than starting them out as the icons we know them as. Starting with his Superman book, I really like this. The influences of the Golden Age are great, and I like how he made Clark believably insecure while still keeping the same heroic instincts that make him who he is. I like the new take on Brainiac as well. The Lois Lane book is a huge risk, but one that I think might pay off. Using Lois as the no-nonsense human eye on the superhero community is a great hook. Not sure about the new GL – Hal is one of the DC characters who seems the most distinctly “male” to me, and especially not a teenage girl. But the title as a whole is excellent. When it comes to Batman, I’m scratching my head a bit at the writer – Chuck P. is pretty in-demand and a huge name – but the hook is pretty interesting. This is undeniably a darker, more twisted take on Batman, which fits the writer. I can see it, but I have the most questions here. I’ve got to say, though, I love the Wonder Woman pitch. It’s recognizable enough, but manages to put some really intriguing new twists in there. Great creative team, as well. Overall, this is one of my favorite pitches so far.

Marc-  I think the Superman pitch is a nice way to build the character from the ground floor, almost a comic version of a Smallville reboot and less of a Superman reboot. The Lois Lane pitch is a bit of a head scratcher. Four titles and one of them is given to a co-star? Chuck Palahniuk on Batman is another stretch, and for the characters and plot I’m not sure I know who is who. Does Batman not even have a secret identity? Not a very clear pitch. I would love to see more from the Wonder Woman pitch as well. It all feels very incomplete and not enough of a universal feel to keep the attention of readers.

JARED

Andrew: Creators– I think these creative teams are pretty spot on. Costa is a very good choice for a Shield book and I did like Steranko getting some work on your Defenders. 9/10

Andrew Books Another Cloak and Dagger fan? Outside of X there aren’t any teams that scream anchor titles that new readers would flock to but that’s a minor quibble. You did an excellent job detailing the back story of this universe and establishing each of the books with its own unique voice. 9/10

Andrew Total- 9/10

Glenn: Good

It’s another great pitch layout, it shows in this challenge who’s done this a while and who hasn’t.

I like your creative teams; all follow the criteria and give new talent the opportunity to shine

The Iffy

Marvel Universe meets Lovecraft is another big what if alternate world.  All your books sound really, really good and would probably be compelling reading but it’s not what I’m looking for in a relaunch.  I’m starting to feel like we actually did do an elseworld challenge at this rate.

Again Cloak and Dagger is going to struggle at the best of times.  In a scenario like this when it’s an elseworld story (which it is) then they could blossom but it’s another headscratching decision.

The Bad

Another ‘Ultimate’ Marvel pitch with no Spider-man title or Peter Parker in sight.  This should really be a basic but I don’t see how he could fit in this world (which is a problem in on itself)

Overall

Quality stuff but again missed the point of the challenge entirely but didn’t do anything overly offensive.

Ray- Jared definitely put a ton of thought into the set-up for his universe, but I worry that he’s putting in way too much cosmic stuff for new readers. The thing about an Ultimate Universe is that it doesn’t have to be high-concept – it’s about getting down to the core of the characters. Still, it’s a pretty intriguing status quo. Looking at the individual books, the setup for SHIELD is very strong. The T’challa/Strange team isn’t something I’ve ever thought about before, but it could work. I liked the original concept for Defenders, but I think it’s dragged down by the fact that all these characters are kind of unlikable, save Steve Rogers. It feels like this is a step down for Luke Cage in particular, bringing him back to an exaggerated version of his 70’s blaxploitation persona. X…well, it’s certainly a unique concept for an X-men book, but I think this is where it gets into “X-men in name only” territory. High concept isn’t always a good thing when it leads to a property being near unrecognizable. As for Cloak and Dagger, this really doesn’t resemble the original concept at all, and I don’t think a second spy book starring obscure characters is really what this universe needed. The best thing this universe has going for it is a double dose of Mike Costa on spy books, though.


Marc- I really like the concept and creative team for SHIELD. As a core title for this universe it works really well. I’m a little less sold on The Defenders, even though I like the concept, mainly because of the name (with it essentially being Heroes for Hire led by Steve Rogers and no pay). I would read the hell out of X and it’s one of my favorite pitches in all of the submissions. Cloak and Dagger is also a neat concept. What the pitches are missing however are a better description of what to expect over the first year of stories. Your universe is clearly built, but that’s backstory that isn’t clearly defined as the overall narrative.

 

SAM

Andrew: Creators– I really like all of the creative teams that you put on the books. I don’t have anything bad to say about any of them. Strong choices. 10/10

Andrew: Books– You were the only one that took what I thought were the 4 obvious choices for a line up: Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman and the Justice League team up book. I really liked how you set up and detailed what Alpha is all about and modernized these characters but still kept their core intact. I think you laid out your plans for each book well and were able to keep the titles separate but also close enough to show a shared universe. 9/10

Andrew Total- 9.5/10

Glenn: The Good

Another branding success and differentiating your books.  This is basic stuff and is exactly what the company would do.  Major props for doing it when many didn’t.

Another great structure to a pitch, with in depth information on not only the books but some serious research done on each of the talents involved.

Each of your books are absolutely flawless.  This is again what I was looking for in this challenge.  You take enough elements of the familiar so people know this is a new version of an existing character but do some exciting new stuff with the properties.  Each books sounds amazing and I can honestly say if DC did these books tomorrow I’d buy each and every one of them.  So much thought and little touches in each book really makes your pitch shine overall.

Brilliant creative teams and thanks for the info on each person.  It’s saved me doing a google on some of the other people that have been chosen.  Anything that saves me time with so many pitches to read is a good thing.

The Iffy

There’s a typo in Casselio

The Bad

You make me sad these books aren’t happening.

Overall

Brilliant

Ray- Hands down, my favorite pitch. The characters are recognizable, the creative teams are top-notch, and the revamps are inventive and logical. Starting with Wonder Woman, the decision to make her a human pulled into this world works well for a character who’s always had a bit of trouble connecting with the audience. The use of Donna Troy works really well here, and the creative team has a ton of potential. The Batman pitch takes the most risks of any here, having Bruce grow up among the working class – and I love it. The new take on Alfred is fantastic, adding interesting new levels to their relationship. And a Batman who’s seen both sides of Gotham is great. Costa and Zircher are a note-perfect choice for this book. Superman is the safest pitch, I think, but so many things about the character work. I like the little tweak about him getting his powers “Activated” rather than having them develop slowly, and Ed Brisson is a writer whose take on Superman I’d love to see. Meanwhile, Justice League is exactly the kind of slam-bang epic adventure that a Justice League book should be, and balances its characters very well. Love the choice of Dysart, too. Pretty much perfect on all fronts.

Marc– I’m impressed with the changes to Wonder Woman and how you get them to work, but I’m not 100% sold on the writer. He’s not bad, but may be overmatched with this title (and this is a very minor quibble). Poor man’s Batman is an interesting take and again is a large change that you seem to make work well. I love the Superman Alpha pitch. LOVE IT. This is what I had hoped from the New52. A few spelling and grammar issues in the pitches (especially in Justice League). I would have also liked to see more characters involved in the Justice League pitch as that could have been a great universe-building tool that you don’t quite use to the fullest potential.

ANDREW

Andrew: Creators– I think you had one of the strongest line up of creators of the group. I like everyone that was used here as well as where you selected them. I think Matt Miner on Animal Man isn’t just a very good choice but probably a prophetic one. 10/10

Andrew: Books– I think you gave great explanations as to how each of the books would work but I think outside of BAT-MAN these are some really obscure choices to headline a universal launch.  BAT-MAN is a darker character here and certainly different from the version most people know but I think it would work. Likewise Animal Man has enough going for it to set it for cult status at least. While I think you did a good job laying out the concept of Wildcat and Ambush Bug both were a little too bare to override my skepticism at whether they’d be good initial launches. 6/10

Andrew: Total- 7/10

Glenn: The Good

Another good pitch layout.

I like calling your Batman book ‘The Bat-Man’ which harkens back to the characters early days and I think fans would dig.

Although I’m not sure on your books dependency on magic they do sound like good titles.  They’re bizarre titles (see the iffy) but they do sound good.

The Iffy

Some bizarre choices for titles in a new relaunched line.  Seriously what does everyone have against Green Lantern and the Flash?  Again kudos for taking a chance and thinking outside the box but in this occasion again I think it’s too far (See: The Bad)

The Bad

Ambush Bug?   Really?  This is like being in a race and you’ve chopped off your leg thinking it’ll somehow give you an advantage over the people you’re racing against.  This is a competition and you have 13 other people to beat.  Why are you also making yourself an obstacle by making such poor choices?

No Superman book which I think makes as much sense as no Spider-Man book in a Marvel relaunch.  Should be a basic no brainer and just seems like your making your job harder for yourself.

It’s Marjorie Liu again!  Makes me sad.

Overall

You’ve given yourself an uphill battle.  There’s nothing terrible in your books themselves but they’re really confusing choice apart from Bat-man which has elements of quality and a great title but finds itself as the odd man out in a party no one would be interested in going to.

Reads more like a series of new Vertigo launches.

Ray–  Very odd choices of titles all around. It feels like Andrew deliberately tried to go for a more eccentric, offbeat DCU. While that’s an intriguing angle, I don’t know if the titles came together as a hole well enough for it to work. Animal Man is probably the best of the lot, creating a credible alternate take on an Animal Man who’s lost touch with his humanity. I was glad to see Andrew do at least one title with an A-lister in Bat-man. While I’m not a big fan of the idea of Batman as a killer, the pitch itself explains itself well and I think it’s a credible take on a darker alternate version. The Wildcat pitch is well-written, but the idea of Wildcat as a were-cat seems a bit too on the nose, and takes a way a bit of the charm of the character as a blue collar boxer. Still, all three of these pitches are well-written, and have good creative teams. The Ambush Bug pitch doesn’t work for me at all, unfortunately. The other three books had a cohesive unit with a clear focus on a coming major threat. This one was really more of a joke book, and didn’t fit tonally with the rest of the line. Overall, there’s flashes of greatness here, but not often enough. Too many odd choices.

Marc– Picking two of the more obscure characters (Ambush Bug and Wildcat) and making three of the characters’ origins and abilities very similar doesn’t work very well. Giving Bat-Man superpowers takes away one of the best parts of the character. I like the concept behind Animal Man, but the remaining three pitches don’t work well. The creative teams were nicely done, but I they don’t do enough to rescue this submission that missed the mark.

MARY

Andrew: Creators– I really liked the choices here. A lot of names that may be unfamiliar to some but I think they’re the quintessential outside the box choices that would do well in a line debut, particularly the way you set up your new universe. 9/10

Andrew: Books– I like the backstory here and the concept that you’ve created for this universe. I enjoyed the aspect of the Council and how it’s sort of a unifying factor for all the books. I thought the names of the books were the most risky part of the pitch as a lot of newer readers may not know what the connection is but that could also be a good thing. MOONSLIDE may play better than Justice League. I think you went as far as you could with the characters to remove them from current DCU without making them too unrecognizable. Some interesting and maybe risky choices but overall I really liked the whole thing. 9.5/10

Andrew: Total 9.25/10

Glenn: The Good

Another solid pitch layout.  It may sound condescending when I say it but it really is appreciated to see them laid out in a professional manner.

More solid creative team choices that follow the criteria outlined.

The Iffy

Anyone that’s turned the elseworld rather than ultimate world into a drinking game can take another shot.  Again you’ve presented an alternate take on future events that sound very, very interesting and is very well written but isn’t really what we asked for.  It’s such a shame because I can see that you have a great creative flair and some solid ideas but this isn’t what I imagined when the challenge launched.

The Bad

Your book titles don’t convey to me what you’re trying to sell.  I’d just have no clue.  DC has some of the most recognizable heroes in the world and their names are known by the majority of the public.  You want to use them to sell your new line but your titles don’t convey to me anything about the characters involved (apart from the Gotham one).

Overall

Great ideas but seems like it’s for a different challenge that the majority of the contestants have made up for themselves

Ray–  Another really strong, really well thought out pitch for Ultimate DC. The initial concept is just so insane – shades of The Happening! – that it shouldn’t work, but through good writing, it actually does. I find it hard to separate these titles, because they work so closely and cohesively, so I’ll just talk about the universe as a whole. I think one problem she has is the odd choices of titles, which will cut down on sales. But beyond that, with every title I read about, I wanted to read this universe more and more. The characters are full of clever, realistic little touches, such as Supergirl being torn between Superman and Wonder Woman, and the way Captain Atom is slowly unraveling. I like the occasional use of original characters, not enough to take away from the icons but to give it some new flavor. Ross Campbell as the main architect is a great choice, and I can see Amber Benson doing a good job on a WW-centric series as well. Alex Robinson is a great choice for this creepy Gotham story as well. I feel like this is one of the most complete, original pitches we’ve received.

Marc– One of the best overall concepts for a universe but the submission is far from perfect due to some missteps. One small problem I had with all of the pitches were the overly complicated and unrecognizable titles that take away the marketability that an Ultimate DC universe provides. I also think that it was daring to add in some original characters in lieu of existing characters who could have filled those roles, which shows a nice level of creativity. Ross Campbell on two titles also makes for an unwise decision leaving so many opportunities on the table. I also think that each vast title concept could have used some refining so that the casts were not all so similar. It almost feels like one weekly title instead of four different books.

GIULIE

Andrew: Creators– I’m very impressed with the creative teams here. I think you picked several great creators to be paired up on these new books particularly the Scarecrow team. 9/10

Andrew: Books– Going all Batman/Gotham was an interesting choice. I don’t know if it really captures the universal ideal of launching a new brand but it’s hard to argue against the popularity of the characters and I do like that two of the books are focused on less heroic aspects of Batman’s universe. You weren’t afraid to go all out, changing one major character’s race and another one’s sex. While there is a risk of moves like that coming off as pandering I think the choices work in this case and I really enjoyed how you redefined Batman/Bruce Wayne for a new generation. 7/10

Andrew: Total- 8/10

Glenn: The Good

The all sound like great books with compelling new takes on the characters and some interesting changes to status quo but…(see: The iffy/the Bad)

Great creative teams on each book

The Iffy

They’re all Batman books.  Now I know DC is currently milking the Batman line for all it’s worth but in a relaunch you’d want to see some variety.  It’s like your world includes Batman and only Batman.  It’s a good take on the character but I really would have liked to have seen your takes on the other iconic heroes too.

The Bad

It’s Holy Bat overload it seems.  No Superman or anyone else. Just seems like a specialist line for fans that enjoyed the Nolan movies and don’t care about anything else but that’s not really what a reboot would be about.

Overall

4 great Batman books but DC isn’t just Batman

Ray- Okay, Batman sells. We know that. But an Ultimate DC pitch of nothing but Batman? That’s a bit of a stretch. There’s a lot of changes made here, some that work, and some that don’t. I don’t have an issue with race-swapping Batman (there aren’t very many old-money black families, but that can be worked around), but I do have a big issue with Bruce’s parents dying in an accident. The death of the Waynes is up there with Uncle Ben being killed by someone Peter let go or Cap being a man out of time as an element of a character that is just absolutely key to who they are. The Scarecrow pitch is intriguing, and I like the idea of seeing the story from the villain’s side as well, but it gets sort of thin after that. I don’t have a problem with a female Commissioner Gordon (we have that already in Batman Beyond), but there just isn’t enough here to make a strong book. I pretty much hate that she has Alzheimers – I think if you’re going to gender-swap Gordon, you can’t give her any additional weaknesses. The Arkham pitch doesn’t really break any new ground and doesn’t seem to have enough going on to justify an ongoing. I like the creative teams a lot, but overall, this pitch seems like a missed opportunity. With so many great corners of the DCU to explore, Gotham did not need four books, and with the core of Batman changed so radically, I have a lot of issues here.

Marc– Very sparse title summaries and some minor misspellings that stand out (Magnum Cum Laude). But the biggest problem is having four completely linked titles that ignore 90% of the rest of the DCU, and even then you went with Scarecrow, Arkham and Commissioner Jane Gordon’s memoirs instead of Batgirl, Nightwing or countless other possibilities that still would have been misguided in staying only in the Batman universe. Elijah Brubaker is a real reach among what are otherwise some really nice creative team assignments for the titles you selected. The books are too much one-note and don’t really feel like something that would gain traction with a big fanbase.

 

JEREMY

Andrew: Creators– For the most part I enjoyed your choices for creators. I also really like that you provided explanations as to why you wanted these creators on those books. I also liked how you put some very small press creators on some of the books although I thought Rachel more of a horror writer than big superheroey epic. 7/10

Andrew: Books I think you did a solid job on the books themselves. Batman, Superman and Justice League make sense sales wise. Spectre is an outside the box choice but I would really like to read it, especially as written by Tim Seeley. I liked taking away Batman’s gadgets and money and think it’d provide pretty great storytelling possibilities even though I’m not sold on evil Jim Gordon. The one thing I would have liked to see more fleshing out of the books themselves. It seems like we just got the most basic of information and in the future I’d like a bit more detail. 7/10

Andrew: Total 7/10

Glenn: The Good

Another great pitch layout with helpful bios on the creators involved which again is much appreciated.

Great creative teams that seem suited to each book.

You seem to turn a lot of stuff on its head.  I think you’ve kept a lot of familiar elements for a relaunch that still keep this as more ‘Ultimate’ than ‘elseworld’.  This is like having Krypton destroyed by a hostile force in Earth One or making the Green Goblin an actual huge mutant Goblin.  You make changes but keep it very familiar.  I love the sound of all your books and the changes you’ve made sound familiar.

The Iffy

Lots of typo’s/bag grammar.  I’m not the best at this either but if you’re in doubt you should get someone to read over your work.  We’re a small company but still maintain a professional standard.

I like the back to basics approach with Batman but I don’t forsee him lasting long without the characters usual resources.  You’ve definitely got a more realistic take which is awesome but he probably won’t last a month J

The Specter over some more recognizable characters?  Again sounds like a solid book but I don’t think we’ve seen a Flash pitch yet.  Seems like an easy one to me and too much of people trying to think of something that’s different.  Do different on bigger name characters, that’s the point.  You did it brilliantly on the other 3 books.

The Bad

Nothing overly offensive

Overall

A great effort but take more time to read over what you’re writing.  It’s early in the game and a lot of people made much worse errors but you don’t want something so basic to kick you in the ass later on

RayJeremy has a pretty solid pitch, with some big changes to the characters, but he keeps the Ultimate vibe pretty strong and has some great creative teams. Starting with Batman, he’s the second creator to go with a blue-collar Batman. I’m not sure I like a Batman without Wayne Enterprises, but at the same time, I’m pretty impressed with how he managed to work so many characters in, especially Alfred. The Superman pitch is really strong. Again, he breaks one of the sacred cows with the character, by having Krypton still exist, but the core of the character is intact, and seeing Clark (and Kara) torn between their two worlds has a ton of promise. The idea of an all-female Justice League is interesting, and the cast is pretty strong, although I question where certain big franchises, like Flash and GL, are in this universe. The Spectre title is an odd fit for the last book (especially with the former titles missing), but Tim Seeley is a brilliant choice for the book, and the title has a pretty strong hook. I think Jeremy’s got a solid collection of books here.

Marc- Batman is a weak pitch. If Bruce joined the force at 18 and has a 16-year-old son, then has he been a cop for at least that long or did he quit? Moving Superman back to Krypton and making it a self-contained book takes one of the biggest characters in the DCU out of play for a year. Justice League is the most interesting book, but suffers with a small-name cast. The creative teams were 50/50 in terms of talent that is ready for the big leagues. I’d love to stock a challenge like this with my friends, but I won’t win if I do. I think a lot of what is wrong with the pitches could have been fixed if you gave more information on the books and characters as the submission is rather sparse in terms of details.

RANK-                    

GlennMost of you seemingly missed the point of the task entirely.  This is an Ultimate relaunch not an elseworld or alternate reality.  This is Earth One or Ultimate not the Nail or Dark Knight Returns or 2099.  I’m surprised how many people missed the point entirely.

The challenge was twofold at this point.  It was to see who could meet deadline and who could follow instructions.  If you manage to do both you’re off on the right foot.  Most of the high rankers did both.  They made mistakes but they understood the basic principle of the challenge.

Those that did the elseworld challenge I’ll rank you based on the quality of your ideas presented/the creative teams you picked and how closely they matched the guidelines.  The devil may indeed be in the details.

It’s early on so there’s a good way to go.  Take the advice given and get better.  I see it all the time in the UK version of the show that some of the weaker players can go on to the final few or even win.  If you survive this week, wipe the sweat off and come back and do better because it sure as hell is going to get harder from here.

 

Andrew                                 Glenn                                        Ray                       Marc

SAM- 9.5                               SAM                                         SAM                         SAM
MARY- 9.25                       WILLIAM                             MARY                   WILLIAM
RON- 9                                    STEVE                                   RON                         FORREST
WILLIAM- 9                      JEREMY                               WILLIAM            JARED
STEVE- 9                             COURTLAND                     JEREMY               MARY
JARED- 8                             NATHAN                               STEVE                    COURTLAND
NATHAN- 8                       MARY                                     NATHAN               STEVE
GIULIE- 8                           FORREST                            COURTLAND       NATHAN
JEREMY- 7                         JARED                                    JARED                    JEREMY
ANDREW- 7                         GIULIE                                FORREST                RYAN
COURTLAND- 6.5            RONALD                            ANDREW                RONALD
FORREST- 6                         ANDREW                            GIULIE                  ANDREW
RYAN- 5                                 RYAN                                     RYAN                        GIULIE
SHANE- 4                              SHANE                                   SHANE                    SHANE

 

COMBINED SCORE-

Sam Reed 14, 14, 14, 14 (56)
William Levert 13, 11, 13, 11 (48)
Mary Sheridan 10, 13, 8, 13 (44)
Steve Dishon 8, 10, 12, 9 (39)
Jeremy Thomas 6, 6, 11, 10 (33)
Ronald Montgomery 4, 12, 4, 12 (32)
Jared Moore 11, 9, 6, 6 (32)
Nathan Kenkel 7, 8, 9, 8 (32)
Courtland Funke 9, 4, 10, 7 (30)
Forrest Helvie 12, 3, 7, 5 (27)
Giulie Speziani 2, 7, 5, 3 (17)
Andrew Shaw 3, 5, 3, 4 (15)
Ryan Cady 5, 2, 2, 2 (11)
Shane Berryhill 1, 1, 1, 1 (4)

 

This means SHANE, RYAN and ANDREW we’ll see you in the boardroom. Everyone else can sleep a little easier tonight. 

 

CHALLENGE #1- Completed Projects- http://www.grayhavencomics.com/2013/07/26/the-apprentice-1st-challenge-completed-projects/

CHALLENGE #1- Ultimate All Star- http://www.grayhavencomics.com/2013/07/20/the-apprentice-day-1-1st-challenge-ultimate-all-stars/

GRAYHAVEN COMICS APPRENTICE- Meet the Contestants- http://www.grayhavencomics.com/2013/07/20/gray-haven-comics-apprentice-meet-the-team/

 

 


	

One Response to GRAYHAVEN COMICS APPRENTICE- 1st Challenge- The Judge’s Feedback

  1. attila July 28, 2013 at 5:35 am #

    Very entertaining… in terms of all the presentations and sentiments alike.
    It was a though challenge, so kudos to all the contestants and judges, for providing us with an excellent read. You all deserve 25 hours per day compensation for a whole week… at least.

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